don’t “practice” it. Being self-reflective is my unbiased position in life. I do not act on compulsion or behave ridiculously without first considering the budding outcomes of my actions, how they might imitate me and what the benefits and cons might be.
I suppose it would take a lot of effort for someone who isn’t used to pondering over things to adjust to a “stricter” way of behaving themselves, but I honestly don’t even think about it
Self-Reflection is time allocated to examining your own character and beliefs. As we go through our busy lives, we seldom spend time trying to understand our various actions. Self-Reflection is a solution to enrich us and give a deeper meaning to our life.
To balance the process, we can take a few moments of calm and try to analyze our situation from unalike lenses. Self-Reflection will give us various insights and perspectives that would have not struck us before. it is more of an individual's assessment of himself where he tries to look at things without bias. Self-Reflection has a propensity to calm us and open ourselves to changes or new inputs. It helps us to evenly take an inventory of our actions and reflexes.
In addition, it is the most meaningful way to achieve a healthy mind and body. We spend most of our lives on autopilot, following social expectations while disregarding our true needs and desires. Information overload blocks our capacity to pay attention to our internal sources of wisdom, our sensations, feelings, and creative thoughts.
From my perspective, for everything I do in life, I have a list of routines and contingencies in place. And that’s because I spend time contemplating what my needs are and how I can be most effective in a practical sense. But rather than feel incredulous by this constant stream of thoughts, I just take it for granted. It’s when I speak with people who don’t behave this way that I feel exhausted. Just the thought of not thinking very much makes my head spin! It would be painful for me to not have things to think about.
If you do this for the first time in such depth you might feel a little bit weird, writing your own thoughts down and guiding yourself. I experienced this myself as I thought of this as a weakness, to reflect on my problems. This is nothing more than social conditioning like “a real man (or woman) doesn’t reflect on problems, he/she solve them”. Of course, this is totally stupid since analyzing a complex situation is the key to effective action and once, I got the benefits of this process, I never gave it up again.
What worked for me really well is the following process of self-reflection. I hope it can be helpful for others as well:
1. Get into the right state and atmosphere
To be effective with Self-Reflection is to get into a suitable mental state and ecosystem. Firstly, it is helpful to have all of our attention at the process, so don’t be distracted by maybe having the TV turned on, etc. It is best if you don’t have anything else on your mind. You don’t want to get interrupted either.
For me, the best time to do it is in the evening when I have some exclusive time for myself, or on Sunday afternoon. So, clear your mind first of the task you have to do tomorrow and get a bit stress-free. Then focus your mind on the right question …
2. Ask the right questions
I usually start by asking myself the question that is on my mind, the question that expresses an inner conflict. It is something that has a continuing influence on me, where I am not satisfied with and want to change.
By asking a good question, you give your brain something to work on. It will try to find a good explanation for it, thus starting the process of Self-Reflection. So, it is crucial to ask the right question here, the one that expresses your topic. Good questions are always the ones that bring your topic to the point by asking “How can I …”. Usually questions starting with “Why …” are not very effective. By asking Why-Questions you will get answers to why it is that way. But you want to improve here, that’s why a How-Question is more solution-oriented and therefore usually much more empowering.
3. Be 100% truthful
When thinking about your question, answer it to the best level of truth. Break out of social taming and beliefs that other people put onto you. If you really ask yourself, you can find a much deeper answer to questions. Being truthful to yourself is the key, without this, you won’t get very far. Of course, this truth may be unpleasant or even scary.
In brief, nothing will get better until you tell yourself the truth. Nothing can really change. You can delude yourself for a while, but life finds a way to show to you if you are off course. The power lies within telling yourself the truth and then acting from there.